Mommy in Pieces

Just a mom that wears a cape under her street clothes.

Archive for the category “start”

Demons Be Gone

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I was the girl that ALWAYS looked for the excuse.  Tried to find a way to explain away my unhealthy life.  Felt a calling and a magnetic pull to the couch and the TV.  I could come up with a million reasons at the drop of the hat as to why I was overweight; genetics, my knee, I tried hard…..

 

1381960_10151945025045871_200699152_n(1)I cant tell you the exact moment that I decided that enough was enough, it was a gradual awakening.  I laced up my shoes, chose healthy over what I “thought” I wanted.  I walked, then I jogged, then I ran!  I have completed races that my own community said that I would fail at.

Last night.. the old demons surfaced.  I was tired, I wanted sweets, I was stressed out by life and my kids.  It was late, there was a wild storm raging, the treadmill had stuff on it, there was TV to watch…  But, I put on my shoes, I put on my workout clothes.  Stepped on to the treadmill that I hadn’t used since I had gotten it for free a few months ago.   The sound of the motor so loud in my second floor apartment, I wanted to turn it off.  The pounding of my steps echoing…  I thought for sure the folks downstairs would call animal control to report a heard of elephants had taken up residence on the second floor.  Then the coup de grâce, I discovered the belt on the treadmill itself was slippery.. I kept sliding.  My face felt a magnetic pull to the display console.  Every time I tried to pic up the pace to get into a run, gravity tried to have its way with me.  I REALLY wanted to quit.  Instead, I increased the incline, kicked up the speed to a fast walk and climbed and held on for dear life!!  I think that I even got a decent arm workout!

2miles of up hill climb, sweating buckets, I had fought back the weight of excuses drawing me back to a sedentary existence. Never give up.  No Excuses.  Making the hard choices for an even better future.

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Lacing Up

I laced up today. Generally, this isn’t anything remarkable.. People do it every day all around the world…
Glow shoes

But this was the first time the rubber met the road since an abysmal race with injury on Thanksgiving. I gave up. I put my shoes in the closet. I was afraid of my already fragile knee that was hurting with every step. It was easier to give up “the run” willingly, than to be told “never again” by a doctor.

After a month and a half, I was ready to try again. To feel like a virgin runner taking those first steps.

I have gone back to the basics. Back to week1 day1 of C25k, easing back into it, testing my knee, willing it to be ok.

I completed 2.27 miles today… They weren’t fast. I followed the program. But it felt so wonderful to feel the wind on my cheeks, the crunch of sand and gravel used my feet.

They were both the hardest and the most wonderful miles.  Now.. to do it again!  Back onto the horse I climb.

Running Away

One foot in front of the other is all it takes to take the power away from the problems in life.

A year ago I took my very first steps in my very first road race. I was scared out of my wits!

Lets rewind to October of 2003. I was working in a retail job while finishing up grad school.  Imagine me on top of a ladder and then suddenly not!!  That unplanned leap lead to 2 knee surgeries and multiple years of rehab. The pounds packed on and I turned very quickly to sloth like ways.

Fast forward to October for 2011, two kids later, heavier then ever, I was diagnosed with two herniated discs after a trip to the ER. I was given two options: lose weight or have surgery.  At that point in my life I had already had four surgeries too many and really wanted to stay away from having any more.

In my opting to lose weight, I some how got it in my head that running would be a good way to do this. Mind you, I am not graceful and am made up of equal parts clumsy and non-coordination. What made me think that running was going to be a good idea?!

I started slowly, working through a beginning runners program. Worked on my intervals and more importantly bought all the cool running gear!  Why run, if not for all the snazzy stuff that goes with it.

I am by no means a natural runner!!  Every step is a battle with my subconscious self, the one that stands behind me in the mirror yelling obscenities, the voice the knows me better than I know myself.  As I pound the pavement ( and yes I pound…. Because I am still a big girl) the voice gets quieter.  I can put miles between myself and the negative Nellie that sits on my shoulder.  A morning that starts out poorly can have its course shifted dramatically only lacing up the running soles.

I had never before bought into all that running nonsense. “You can run away from your fears and your problems”. “A good day is any day that starts with a run.”  Really???   I had always thought that you would only catch me running if I was running away from something scary or towards something yummy!!

But….today, I took a different type of step.. I counted my pennies, and I pushed the button.  I officially registered for the Long Island Divas Half Marathon in October.

Yes… You read that right.. A half marathon. To this point my longest distance has been 3.5 miles.  I will need to be able to run 10 more miles on top of that!!!

So stay tuned.. As I train and prepare.  I am sure that along this journey, I will be learning a lot about my self as I put one foot in front of the other ( over and over and over again!)

 

Start!

 It is rare that I venture into the city that never sleeps, the one in my backyard, a mere 50 minute train ride away. It is even rarer that I find myself embarking on a trip there alone.
Don’t get me wrong.. I LOVE the city, but I love experiencing it with friends. It is a place that automatically makes you feel small and insignificant without heaping being alone on top of it.
But today, I stepped outside of my realm of comfort… I am at a book launch event for an author that I recently discovered., Jon Acuff. I am an avid listener of the Dave Ramsey show and was introduced to the book “Quitter”, a very honest conversation about finding and following your path to your dream job.
Jon’s new book “Start” promises to help you punch fear in the face and move into a life of awesome. Jon’s writing is very much a no holds barred discussion with an old friend. He is witty and current but has a way to hit you to the core with a sucker punch of reality. 
 
This launch event was an intimate gathering in an off Broadway theater.  Jon shared with us the main themes of this book in a way only he could. He touched on narwhals, and geriatric versions of Thelma and Louise, shared his path to awesome and the pain of cutting loose the negative forces in your life. We were challenged to take the power away from the voices inside of us, bring them into the light of day to see how small and untrue they are.  It was time to examine our life and move it from average to ordinary! 

All of these words hit me hard. Do I know what my dreams are?  Am I strong enough to fight the voices that are so powerful on the inside?  He told us about the site he started called No More Voices. I have spent some time on there and I think that it is an amazing place for anyone struggling with self doubt.

I don’t know what my future holds.  But what I do know is that my future self will be tickled to look back on this day as my START!

Sarah and Jon Acuff
Sarah and Dave Ramsey

Check out this video about the book “Start”

The Foods for Thought:
I had some time befor the event started and needed a snack. You gotta love food trucks so I took the opportunity for a yummy portobello empanada from Nuchas NYC.

  • Yummy crispy and pocket change prices!

Dinner was a great happenstance!  One of my very special “heart friends” was also in Times Square today and we were able to connect!  We went to one of her favorite places (and now mine too). Havana Central– just one block off of Times Square had the impact of instantly transporting us out of NYC. With beautiful decor and a lively band we shared an amazing seafood paella that left us both wanting a nap!

  •   Convenient and authentic for a special night.
Amazing Seafood Paella!
Julie LOVING her Paella!

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